Welcome Erin Percy to OWY's March investigation of Vulnerability! A few summers ago Erin Percy lost both of her brothers in the span of a few short months. After the overdose of her twin, unable to work or really function, Erin moved to Huron to be closer to her mother and older sister. She was shell-shocked and raw the first time she stumbled into yoga, but it turned out to be a new beginning, the beginning of her finding her way forward into a new life. After that first time she came to yoga every single day - sometimes more than once, she signed up for teacher training and dove into the experience; when she hit the mat as a teacher for the first time a little over a year ago it was clear to all of us: Erin had landed where she belongs. I'm sorry for the tragedy that brought her to us, but I am beyond grateful that she is here... in many ways she's the face of OWY. -Shannon
Me with my twin brother Sean 5 days before he died.
1. I carry immense guilt for both of my brothers passing. I think if I had been a stronger role model my little brother might have made better life choices and would still be alive. I think if I had acted faster and gotten my twin the help he needed, he'd still be alive.
2. Sometimes I feel like my survivors guilt is too heavy. Maybe somewhere deep down I feel bad for having joy in my life. Like, "how can I enjoy these things, when they're not here anymore to enjoy them with me?”
3. The hardest thing to admit is that I am a more fulfilled person after experiencing this loss and suffering. Being "broken open" adds a richness to your life. An understanding you may not get without your world completely shattering.
4. I have struggled with different coping mechanisms to deal with my grief. Drugs, alcohol, tv, social media, food, sex. Anything to fill the void. It's like walking through a field of tall grass, looking for a clearing.
5. I can be so mean to myself. "I am not enough", "I am ugly", "I am all alone." It's a script I've said for so long, it's so hard to break that cycle.
6. I allow my fear of failure and my self doubts stop me from following my dreams.
7. I am surrounded by so many amazing, strong, brilliant, and creative women. Sometimes I compare myself and wonder if I deserve to be working next to them.
8. I have never wanted children. Sometimes I fear I'll always be lonely. Then I laugh as I remind myself there are 7 billion people on earth, if I'm lonely it's my own damn fault!
9. I miss my mom so much. She moved away, and I hate the fact that I need her. I've always been so independent and it makes me feel weak and uncomfortable.
10. I love myself so much. Seems like such a contradiction. I love all of me though. Ups and downs, beauty and the real ugly. I know I'm precious and perfect, flawed and broken. More than anything, I am love.
My twin brother Sean with our younger brother Ryan.
Erin's OWY Teaching Schedule
10:30 - 11:45 Gentle Yoga in Norwalk
6:00 - 7:15 PM Yoga Flow in Huron
9:00 - 10:15 Sculpt Yoga in Huron
8:30 - 9:45 Yoga Flow in Sandusky
8:30 - 9:45 Yoga Flow in Norwalk